Honestly. If anyone says "Oh Darling!" one more time! Tilda Swinton is "Julie", a film-maker with a bit of writer's block who takes her elderly mother (I think she is called "Rosamund" but anyway, think Tilda Swinton but this time in a bit of latex and some of Margaret Thatcher's attire) to a remote country hotel. It turns out that this used to be a family home for her mother and she spent much of her younger life there with her aunt. From room to room they reminisce about what it used to be, what went on here - all whilst the wind outside blows as if we were watching "Black Narcissus" (1947). What happens now? Well, very little... There is lots of desperately polite and earnest dialogue - beetroot or feta? - as the two women edge ever closer to a birthday that is clearly tinged with increasingly sad, but unspecified, memories. The denouement - well it's a surprise to nobody, not even the frequently scene-stealing "Louis" (Swinton's own dog). Carly-Sophia Davies is quite effective as the downright disinterested hotel receptionist but that's about all we have to inject any life into this rather charmless and disappointing "ghost" story that really does underwhelm. Joanna Hogg definitely has a safe zone for her films. Well-heeled English folks in the media industry with even more well-heeled parents who all live in a world with little to do with any reality most of us will ever be able to relate to. A repetitive flute refrain does all that it can to introduce some mystery, but by half way through I was just "You are very welcome"'d out. It will look just as good on the television as it does on cinema screen so I'd save your cash, if I were you.
